Becoming Immune to Rachel Berry
by BackInBlack99
Summary: Rachel Berry was screwing with his mind. Like seriously. He couldn't stand to be around her, but everytime she walked away he wanted to follow.
1. Road Rage

**Disclaimer: Much to my disapointment, i don't own Glee...**

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Puck slammed the door of his truck shut with a great deal more force than was necessary, attempting to vent some of the frustration he'd been feeling all week. Yeah, it was less satisfying than kicking the shit out of some passerby, but at least it meant he wouldn't get another "anger issues" lecture from Mr Schue. Sadly, the thought of his Spanish teacher did nothing to improve his mood and he drove to school in a fit of road rage so impressive that it would have startled even Finn, who after thirteen years of friendship had witnessed some of the highest ever recordings on the Puckerman scale of Pissed Off. But then again, Finn had never factored into the equation Rachel Berry…

As Puck pulled into the lot, he scowled at the sight of Rachel's pristine blue Volvo heading for one of the only available spaces.

"Fuck that" he growled, stamping his foot on the accelerator so hard that the engine spluttered as the truck jerked forward in hasty pursuit. Due to Rachel's more pedestrian conscience approach to driving, the two teenagers reached the space at the same time. Puck spun the wheel so that he cut across her, then hit hard on the breaks. Rachel was forced to make a dainty swerve to avoid collision and a few seconds later she was rolling down her window looking scandalised.

"Noah! What on earth do you think you're playing at? We could both have been killed!"

Puck stuck his head out his window and looked down at her. "'Sup, Berry?" He smirked, ignoring the hooting from the pile up behind them.

"I demand that you move that monstrosity which you call a vehicle immediately" she ordered him, pointing at his truck with a distasteful expression.

"Make me" said Puck belligerently.

Rachel tutted impatiently. "I'm not arguing with you Noah, but frankly this is ridiculous. I was clearly about to pull into this space when you rudely cut across me and nearly caused a fatal accident."

"Fatal accident?" Puck snorted. "As if. Lame dogs were going faster than you, Berry."

"At least I was _obeying the speed limit_" Rachel snapped. "Which is more than I can say for you."

"S'not my fault you drive like a pussy."

Rachel spluttered. "_Excuse me_?"

"I said. You – drive – like – a – pussy" he repeated, enunciating each word clearly as if he was talking to a three year old.

"I heard you the first time" said Rachel through clenched teeth. "I just couldn't believe you were being quite so vulgar."

Puck shrugged. "You say that like it's a bad thing."

"Urgh. You are quite possibly the most annoying person in the universe" Rachel shuddered. "And the fact still remains that you are currently blocking off _my_ parking space."

"I thought we'd already established that I wasn't going to move" said Puck lazily. "And while I don't give a shit about being late for class, I've got a feeling you do."

Right on cue, the bell rang. He looked pointedly at the small crowd of students hurrying into the school building and then back to Rachel with a wicked grin.

"Noah, you've made me late!" Rachel exclaimed with genuine concern. He rolled his eyes at her alarmed expression.

"You seriously need to chill, Berry."

"You may not care about your attendance record, but I do" she told him grimly. "Which, for you information, was exemplary until today."

"I'm ecstatic" he muttered. Rachel began riffling through the bag on the seat next to her, eventually pulling out her homework diary and flicking to the calendar at the back.

"Next to every day that I was present at registration you will find a gold star" she explained, slightly hectically. "Note that there is a star next to _every_ date. Now, due to your childish antics, you have ruined my reputation for punctuality."

"The _fuck_, Berry?" he grunted, looking at the diary she'd thrust in his face in disbelief. She'd officially gone from weird to totally insane. Who the shit cared that much about attendance?

"The gold stars are for motivation" Rachel continued, seemingly undeterred by his disgust. "Qualities such as good timekeeping should be rewarded so as to further encourage them."

Puck ran a hand over his Mohawk, completely at a loss. If she'd been a dude, he'd have pounded her to a pulp for uttering the previous sentence.

"I've been trying to convince Mr Schue to produce a star chart for glee club" she said excitedly. "I think it would serve as an excellent means to promote extra rehearsals."

"Oh God, just stop" he groaned. "I can't take any more."

Rachel opened her mouth, about to berate his unenthusiastic attitude when he was saved by the arrival of Matt and Mike.

"Yo Puckerman!" called Mike, grinning at his friend. The two guys stopped on the sidewalk to wait for him and started laughing at the way his truck was parked diagonally across the space.

"The lines are there for a reason you know" Matt told him in amusement.

"Are you drunk again man?" Mike asked suspiciously.

"Nope" he grinned.

"Cuz I thought we'd talked to you about that" Mike continued sternly. "That time you hit on Miss Sylvester was _ugly_…"

"Dude, she's ancient!" Matt grimaced, scrunching up his nose.

"Plus beer for breakfast is like, so not a good diet" said Mike wisely. "I read that it causes cancer or some shit."

"Yeah, it might have vitamins, but where's the protein?" Matt agreed.

Puck shook his head, wondering how his friends weren't completely flunking school when they were so god damn thick.

"I'm not drunk" he repeated, rolling his eyes.

Mike looked back at the truck. "Then why – ?"

"Why don't cha ask Berry" he said casually, shooting Rachel a smirk.

"Why would I ask – Oh, hey Rachel" said Mike, spotting her car on the other side of the truck. "You ok?"

"Good morning Mike" she said tightly, glaring back at the Mohawked boy with as much disapproval as she could muster. She was entirely unsurprised that he would do something as reckless as consuming alcohol before school. This was the boy who'd crowd surfed at the last glee concert – totally inappropriate and violating just about a _million_ health and safety codes.

Mike's eyes travelled from Rachel's black expression to Puck's smug one. "Er dude?" he asked slowly. "What the hell did you do?"

"Acted in the most ungentlemanly manner I've ever witnessed!" Rachel cut in before he could say anything. "Attempting to crash into me and then proceeding to insult my driving skills whilst detaining me from class."

"Yeah and you loved it Berry" said Puck, winking at her. "Not all girls get this much of my attention."

Rachel let out a harsh laugh. "Don't think you can pull that kind of crap with me Noah" she retorted frostily. "From what I've heard practically all the Cheerio's have received your "attention", as you so delicately put it."

Puck raised an eyebrow at her flushed face and angry expression then muttered something under his breath which sounded suspiciously like "_jealous much_".

Rachel spluttered. "What? No! Of course not. The mere suggestion that –"

"Then how come you're still here?" he said, folding his arms in a gesture that clearly stated "point proven".

Rachel gaped at him. "Because you're IN MY SPACE!" she finally shrieked. "YOU UTTERLY DEPLORABLE IMBECILE."

After this little outburst she immediately felt ashamed. It was obvious Puck was deliberately trying to get under her skin and she was playing right into his hands, giving him the satisfaction of a reaction. Matt and Mike were staring with open mouths.

"Err, I'm sorry about that" she said quickly, looking down at the ground in embarrassment. "It's just that Noah can be incredibly frustrating at times."

Mike's wary expression cleared and he chuckled. "Yeah, don't we know it" he said, giving Puck a friendly punch on the shoulder. Puck frowned – so much for bro loyalty.

"I didn't mean to raise my voice with you present" Rachel added, giving Mike an apologetic smile. "I don't usually have such volatile emotions."

"Nah, its cool" the Asian guy shrugged.

"I'll just go find another parking space then. See you later at Glee club." She waved at the two boys as she reversed off the sidewalk, pointedly blanking Puck.

"Told you she was crazy" he grumbled as she drove away.

"Stop being such a douche" said Mike, frowning at Puck's back as he climbed out the truck. "Rachel's not that bad y'know."

Puck turned round and gave his friend a pained look. "Dude, this is Rachel Berry we're talking about. _Rachel Berry_."

"Yeah I know" said Mike brightly. "And she might be a little bit psycho 'bout singing and shit, but she's alright the rest of the time."

"Plus she makes insanely good cookies" Matt put in. "Remember those ones she brought to Glee the other day?"

"Aww man, they were sweet!"

Puck sighed. It seemed his friends had been won over by Rachel's "apology cookies" that she'd made after coming back from the Play (he was still fucked off about that). But this wasn't much of a surprise when you considered how mental they went over food. Christ, he'd seen Mike cry when there weren't any burgers left in the canteen.

"Actually, I think I might have left a bag of chips in my locker" Matt was saying.

"Let's go" said Mike happily, and they highfived before setting off towards school.

"Wouldn't want to be late" Puck deadpanned, sticking his hands in his pockets and following after them.

The other two left him once they'd got through the front doors, off in search of Matt's elusive snack and Puck wandered down the corridor to class, figuring that he should at least make an appearance at registration. He was rounding a corner when he ran smack into Rachel, who was extremely flustered.

"I'm so sorr – oh, it's you." She looked up at him accusingly before bending down to pick up the folder she'd dropped on impact.

"No problem" he said casually, "I'm used to girls throwing themselves at me."

She made a disgusted noise at his reply and pushed past him.

"Err, Berry?"

"_What_?" she spun round, looking extremely irritated.

Puck tried not to laugh. "Class is the other way."

She closed her eyes for a moment and seemed to draw on some inner patience because when she started speaking her voice was only tinged with annoyance.

"I'm aware of that Noah, but I need to get something from my locker."

"I'll come with" he offered, taking her folder from her and putting it under his arm.

"Um…" Rachel faltered, stunned by his sudden gallantry. "Ok."

They set off back in the other direction, Rachel shooting Puck suspicious glances as he sauntered alongside her, his expression amused but unreadable.

"So, what'cha leave behind?" he asked.

"My pencil case."

"Huh."

Rachel hesitated for a minute. "And you're here because?" she asked as they reached her locker (which Puck was disgusted to find was a lurid pink colour on the inside.)

"That's just the kind of guy I am" he said casually, leaning against the wall and folding his arms.

"Noah. I don't mean to be disrespectful, but that's the biggest load of rubbish I've heard in my life" Rachel snapped.

He broke into an unholy grin and she shuddered at his expression, deciding that something which made Noah Puckerman look that happy was most definitely bad news for her. "So are you going to tell me the real reason you've come with me?" she asked tentatively.

He made no reply but cocked an eyebrow and looked her lazily up and down in a way that made her feel incredibly dirty.

"What are you doing?" she demanded, grabbing back her folder from him and holding it defensively in front of her chest.

"You know this whole "detaining you from class" shit?" he said mockingly as he pushed himself off the wall.

"Yes…" she answered uncertainly as they headed back down the corridor.

"I was wondering what detained meant."

"Oh" she sighed in relief. "Well the dictionary definition is technically locked up or behind bars –"

Puck opened his mouth to speak.

"And don't make some crass comment about that being kinky" she added quickly.

He closed it again.

"But I was using it in the sense of being delayed" Rachel finished.

Puck shook his head, grinning wider. "That's not what I'm getting at."

"Then what are you getting at?" she asked impatiently.

"Just that the others could easily misinterpret "detained" for "stayed out in the car park to make out with the hot football stud"" he said, shrugging nonchalantly.

Rachel's brow furrowed in confusion. "What could possibly give them –"

She broke off as he put an arm round her waist and pulled her tight against him. Shocked, she tried to wriggle free, but his hold was too strong.

"What are you doing?" she hissed, desperately looking around in the hope that a teacher would pass by and rescue her. They were getting dangerously close to their form room and he didn't seem to be letting go.

"Giving everyone something to talk about" he murmured in her ear and pushed open the classroom door with his foot, dragging her in behind him.

The class looked up. Finn, who was sitting at the back of the room and doodling on his Spanish homework, was only slightly surprised to see his best friend wrapped around the girl he supposedly hated – it was Puck after all – and raised an eyebrow. Kurt looked ridiculously excited and immediately exchanged a significant glance with Tina before bending his head towards her so they could discuss everything they'd ever suspected about their fellow glee clubbers. Santana's expression turned ugly as Puck smirked down at Rachel. Whispering broke out across the room.

"Quiet everyone! Er, Puck? Rachel?" Mr Schue was sitting on his desk, apparently half way through taking the register. He looked at the two teenagers in surprise.

"'Sup, Mr Schue" said Puck, letting go of Rachel and sauntering to the back of the room to take his seat next to Finn. Mr Schue decided to overlook this, as Noah being late was as normal as Kurt wearing leopard print or strange exotic feathers to school (he made it a point never to discriminate against students, but sometimes he wondered how many peacocks had died in the making of that boy's wardrobe.) Instead, he turned to Rachel who was still standing at the front of the class, her cheeks flushed.

"Rachel?" he said again. "Why are you late?"

"Erm…" For once in her life, Rachel's impressive vocabulary seemed to desert her. "We had a little trouble in the parking lot" she said lamely, her eyes flicking to Puck, who was tipping back in his chair with his feet propped up on the desk, a smug expression on his face.

"Are you alright?" Mr Schue asked, starting to get concerned by her lack of response.

"Yes, thank you" she said, not looking at her classmates as she walked over to the front row and sat down next to Artie.

"Ok, Good" said Mr Schue, deciding he'd speak to her later at Glee Club and see if anything was the matter. "Let's carry on with the register."

As he continued to call out names, Finn leaned across his desk to talk to Puck.

"Dude, what was that about? I thought you hated Rachel."

"I do. We just had a little trouble in the parking lot" he quoted, smirking to himself as Finn turned his attention back to drawing sombrero wearing zombies.

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**Please R & R :) **


	2. Rumours

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews :) They are much appreciated! **

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"And then he took her in his muscled arms, holding her close against his well defined chest –"

"You're crazy, you know that?"

Kurt, who'd been perched on a desk delivering his story to a rapt audience comprising of Tina, Artie and Brittany turned to Mercedes with an innocent expression.

"What?"

Mercedes put a hand on her hip. "You can have as many sexual fantasies about Puck as you want, but there's no way in hell he's getting it on with Rachel."

Kurt pouted and flipped his pashmina over one shoulder. "You ruin all my fun."

"How do you know?" Tina asked Mercedes and much to Kurt's outrage the group turned away from him to face the other girl.

"Are you blind people?" asked Mercedes incredulously. "I've never seen anybody glare at each other like those two do during Glee. The hate in the room makes me nervous."

"True" Kurt sniffed, "but at the same time you can hardly move for the sexual tension." This was said with only a _slight_ tinge of jealousy. He'd accepted a long time ago that Puck just wasn't the gay sort and had resolved to wear Finn down instead.

Mercedes folded her arms. "Are you telling me that they've been screwing around behind our backs, Hummel? And just pretending to insult each other every single god damn minute?"

"Maybe not, but they're going to" said Kurt, raising a perfectly sculpted eyebrow. "My feminine intuition is aroused."

"Bullshit."

"We'll see…things round here are going to change." And with that ominous proclamation, he flounced out the room.

"He _seriously_ needs to lay off those caffeine soda drinks" sighed Mercedes, shaking her head. "I think they've gone to his brain."

"He's just annoyed because we told him that under no circumstances were we wearing ostrich feathers for our mash up" said Artie.

"Hell no!" Mercedes agreed. "His wardrobe choices get more deranged every day."

Artie chuckled. "It's all good. Mr Schue gave him severe budget limitations."

"Thank God. He tried to get us to wear matching gold Lycra the other day. I mean I know glee club is all about expressing yourself, but I wish he'd do it a bit _quieter._ Where is everyone anyway?" Mercedes gestured around the empty choir room.

Tina looked up at the clock. "It's only three. The guys have football until quarter past."

"I know" said Mercedes, "but Mr Schue usually gets here before now and Rachel's always, like, insanely early."

"Well, if Kurt's "feminine intuition" is correct, then she's locked in the music storeroom making out with Puck" grinned Artie.

"Yeah, and we all know correct his predictions normally are" said Mercedes, rolling her eyes. "Remember the time he thought you and Quinn were getting it on?"

"I still don't know why you found that so funny" Artie grumbled. "It so could have happened. Chicks dig wheels."

"Well I think it would be cute if Rachel and Puck got together" said Tina.

At that moment Kurt re-entered the room carrying a skinny mochachino.

"Well I'm glad to hear someone agrees with me" he said, shooting Mercedes a superior look as he passed. "I always knew you had fabulous judgement Tina."

Tina smiled. "What makes you think Rachel likes Puck?" she asked curiously.

"Other than his divine body?" asked Kurt, as he perched himself on a desk. "Most likely it's his bad boy persona. I, for one, can completely understand why she would find that compelling. And what's more, I just heard some extremely interesting gossip in the hallway." He lowered his voice as he said this and the others were forced to lean in towards him in order to hear. "Apparently, Puck and Santana have –"

"'Sup losers."

"Eeek!" Kurt fell off the desk in surprise as Puck sauntered into the room with his usual greeting.

"What's up with Hummel?" he asked as Kurt hurriedly picked himself off the floor.

"Nothing of interest" said Kurt quickly, smoothing a stray lock of hair back into place and walking towards him, like a cat intent on its prey. "We were just discussing the, err,_ rumours_ that have been circulating about our very own Santana and a certain chemistry teacher…"

Puck frowned. "How'd you hear about that?"

"I have my sources" Kurt smirked. "At the risk of protecting their identities I won't name names. I'm sure they wouldn't want to find themselves waking up in a dumpster. You'll understand."

Puck shrugged and turned away from him. "Whatever."

"So are you and Santana not together anymore?" Tina asked him, exchanging a significant look with Artie.

"We were never together in the first place" Puck answered, wondering over to a desk and sitting down. "That's not the way I roll."

Mercedes shook her head. "Ignoring the fact that every girl in here should cut you for saying that, what she means is are you and Santana still seeing each other? Or have you moved on because of this chemistry guy?"

Puck ran a hand through his Mohawk, somewhat confused. "She only slept with Mr Dreamer to get her grade moved up to a B. Why would I stop hooking up with her? She's hot."

Kurt looked disappointed. "So there's no-one new in your life?"

"Are you hitting on me again, Hummel?"

"No" Kurt sniffed. "I know a lost cause when I see one."

"Good" said Puck, crossing his arms. "Because I am not down with you singing to me in the showers after football practise. Finn might put up with that musical theatre shit, but I sure as hell won't."

"That happened once" said Kurt with great dignity. "And I wasn't singing _to_ you per say, you just happened to be there while I was practising my Celine Dion solo."

Puck shuddered at the memory. "You took my shower gel and used it as a prop." If he hadn't been naked at the time and aware that Kurt would probably have enjoyed it, he would have totally pounded on him.

"Where's Rachel anyway?" he asked hurriedly, not cool with the way Kurt was eyeing up his chest, evidently lost in his own memories of the shower incident. He was surprised that she wasn't here yet. She usually pounced on him the second he got through the door and began teaching him new breathing control techniques or some shit like that (this was another reason why she frequently made him want to set himself on fire. Along with her insistence that he help out at the Jewish community centre – not happening in a million fucking years – and the fact that she cock blocked him that time when he was hitting on a new blonde cheerio and she wouldn't stop lecturing him about the circle of fifths. Seriously. That actually happened).

Despite that, there was a part of him that always felt uneasy whenever he skipped rehearsal or slacked off during routines, like her nagging was actually starting to seep into his brain. Rachel Berry was becoming the voice of his conscience – although admittedly small, it sometimes made an appearance – and how fucking scary was that?

"Miss her do you?" said Artie casually, watching carefully for his reaction.

"Like a hole in the head" Puck muttered.

"So what was all of that about in registration then?" asked Kurt, deciding to cut to the chase. "When Noah Puckerman enters the room with a new girl wrapped around him it usually means someone has to disinfect the bleachers."

Puck grinned. Yeah, he was a badass. Deal with it. "Not my fault she threw herself at me."

This made him think about if Rachel actually _had _thrown herself at him, preferably in his bed in one of her little skirts, or – hell, this was his fantasy and if she was throwing herself at him she'd be doing it naked. He felt himself harden at the thought. How did someone so obsessed with West Side Story manage to be so hot at the same time?

"So nothing happened?" asked Tina.

"I'm not saying that" Puck drawled. It didn't hurt his reputation for the school to think he could get any girl he wanted. Not that he couldn't; if he worked his moves on Berry she'd totally be begging for it. Which posed the question of why he didn't. He'd had pretty much every other girl you could think of – aside from Tina and Mercedes, who were so low down on the glist they barely counted – so why not go for a clean sweep? He'd be McKinley High legend.

It was something that he didn't like to think about, as he couldn't decide if screwing her would be worth the hassle (because of course there would be hassle. The effort put in to seducing her – he was pretty sure she wouldn't fall for his usual trick of wine coolers and showing off his guns – and the trouble of ditching her once they were done. She wasn't like Santana or Brittany. Sex would _mean_ something to her and he'd have to go through all the emotional crap of if it had just been more than just a hook up for him. The answer to which was always no. No exceptions.)

And this went completely against his principles, as sex was always worth the hassle.

Mike's voice cut across his thoughts. "Yo Puckerman."

He looked round to see Mike and Matt walking over to him. Mr Schue still hadn't arrived but most of the glee members were here now. Except Rachel. "Sup?"

"Nothing much" the Asian guy shrugged. "There's this party tonight at Davies' place. You coming?"

"Sure. What time?"

"Eight. Can I catch a lift?" Mike asked.

"Dude, me too" put in Matt.

"Yeah. I'll pick you up about quarter to."

When Mr Schue and Rachel finally turned up (apparently she'd been talking him through the idea of tri-weekly vocal sessions. He wasn't sure if this was just for her or for everyone, he'd kind of dozed off half way through Mr Schue's talk) he took a seat at the back.

So there was a party tonight. At least now he could get laid while thinking about why he wasn't doing Rachel.

Groaning, he dropped his head into his hands. Man she was totally fucking him up.

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** I know this chapter was short, but there's a longer one on the way :) Please review!**


	3. Hot Tubs

Rachel had absolutely no idea what had made her agree to go to the party.

It was too loud, too hot and too full of uncouth, inebriated football players and scantily clad cheerio's. She would much rather have been at home watching Broadway musicals whilst keeping herself fit and healthy on her exercise bike. Some people might say that was an incredibly sad way to spend a Friday night, but personally she felt it was not only invigorating, but educational.

Sighing, she decided that it must have been due to a momentary lapse in rationality brought about by too many stressful glee rehearsals and late nights. On principle, she did not remain in a room where there was such a blatant disregard for morals and personal space, but seeing as Kurt was her ride home and he seemed to have disappeared upstairs, she had no choice but to put up with it. As a can of beer soared over her head to the accompaniment of woops and cheers she shuddered and mentally compared the male students of McKinley High – not for the first time – to a troop of Apes.

"Hey Rach!"

Surprised that someone actually seemed to be addressing her and at the same time slightly panicked as to who it might be, she looked up warily. To her relief she saw Mike battling his away across the crowded room towards her, grinning.

"Hi Mike" she said brightly, happy to see a friendly face.

"What you doing here?" Mike asked as he reached her. "I thought you must have been permanently grounded or something. I never see you at parties."

Rachel found it endearing how Mike didn't seem to judge her and assumed that she didn't go to parties because of her Dads rather than out of choice.

"I don't generally have much time" she said diplomatically, aware that the screaming, dancing, drunken, unconscious, giggling – and to her extreme distaste _openly making out_ – people around her were his friends.

"Oh. Well it's cool you're here now."

"Thanks" she smiled.

"Who are you with?" he asked, his brow furrowing as he noticed that she was perched awkwardly on the arm of a sofa, being ignored by everyone around her.

"Kurt" she told him. "But he seems to be entertained elsewhere."

Mike chuckled. "You could say that. I saw him dragging a very drunk Nate Lawson into a bedroom."

"Oh dear" said Rachel in concern. "I hope neither of them does something they'll regret."

"Nah, don't worry bout it" said Mike, metaphorically swatting away the whole issue with his hand. "Nate always gets with Kurt at parties then denies it at school."

"I see" said Rachel, frowning.

"So, you wanna hang out with me?" asked Mike, offering Rachel his hand.

"I'd like that Mike" she smiled, taking it and allowing him to lead her out the room and into the garden.

"We're out by the hot tub" he told her over his shoulder, as he manoeuvred them past a drunken game of beer pong.

"We?" Rachel asked, hoping that a certain Mohawked person wouldn't be present.

"Matt, Puck, Santana… just the whole group part from Finn" Mike shrugged.

She groaned inwardly. Great. She could now spend the entire night being insulted.

"Why isn't Finn present?" she asked out loud.

"He had to stay home and help his mom clean out the garage" Mike grinned. "That boy is so under the thumb."

"I think it's very commendable that he's doing housework" said Rachel approvingly. "And not enough young people these days see the value of spending time with their family."

Mike gave her a fond look. "You sure come out with a load of funny stuff, Rach."

"I'm going to take that as a compliment Mike."

"Cool."

They reached the hot tub and Rachel fell silent, wondering for the billionth time why on earth she'd come to a party full of people she never normally spent time with apart from when they were forced to tolerate each other's presence during glee. She barely talked to most of them, unless arguing counted as conversation (this was mainly directed at Puck) and in light of that, she decided she might as well just be grateful that there weren't any slushies around.

"Hey guys" said Mike, letting go of Rachel's hand and vaulting over the side of the hot tub. He landed with a huge splash in the water causing the girls to scream and hit him.

"Mike, my hair!" Quinn protested.

"I'm, like, all wet now!" Brittany grumbled.

Puck, who was wrapped extremely closely around Santana, raised an eyebrow.

"Dude, you're in a _hot tub_."

Rachel couldn't help laughing at how completely his sarcasm was wasted on the blonde. However this caused Puck to turn his attention to her and immediately she stopped, not wanting to provoke an attack.

"_Berry_?" he asked incredulously.

"Good evening Noah" she said tightly.

His look of surprise was replaced by a smirk. "What? Did they run out of musicals to rent from the library?" he asked her.

Rachel blushed at how unerringly true his suggestion was.

"Give her a break man" said Mike, jumping to her defensive before she was forced to reply. She smiled at him appreciatively.

"How adorable. Looks like you've found yourself a boyfriend, manhands" said Santana in a saccharine sweet voice, pressing herself even closer to Puck – if that was even physically possibly, thought Rachel sourly. The cheerio was obviously still angry about her and Noah's entrance to registration that morning.

"Mike and I are just friends" said Rachel firmly, looking away as Santana claimed all of Puck's attention in a steamy kiss. It wasn't like she was jealous or anything. It was simply that over zealous public displays of affection between jocks and girls wearing next to nothing just wasn't appealing to her.

"So" said Matt, who was sitting on the other side of Quinn. "You coming in?"

He splashed her playfully and Quinn raised an eyebrow. Evidently she was finding it hard to accept that Matt and Mike seemed to consider her their friend.

"Err, I don't think that's such a good –" Rachel began, but Mike cut her off.

"Come on Rach, there's plenty of room."

"I don't have a bathing suit" she said, playing on the safe side. She didn't want to antagonise the entire cheerleading squad in one day.

"We can fix that for you" said Quinn unexpectedly, tapping Santana on the shoulder so that the brunette broke away from Puck.

"What?" she asked, sounding annoyed and breathless. Puck smirked at the effect he seemed to have had on her.

"Come on. We're going to find Rachel a bikini" Quinn told her, exchanging a meaningful look with the other Cheerio.

"Awesome" said Mike, completely missing out on this. "Can you get us some beer while you're in the house?"

"Sure" said Quinn brightly. "Let's go."

Her and Santana got up and climbed out of the hot tub, Puck slapping Santana on the butt as she passed. Much to Rachel's disgust, the brunette giggled and winked back.

Mike grinned and gave her a thumbs up as Rachel began to follow the two girls across the garden and she smiled faintly at him in return. It was all very well him being sweet and naïve, but at moments like this she found it less endearing and more frustrating. Did he not realise Quinn and Santana hated her amazing singing voice and leading lady star quality? In all probability they were about to do something incredibly evil and this caused her to begin panicking all over again.

"Yo Berry!" Puck called after her.

Half hoping that he might be coming to her rescue, she turned back to face him.

"Yes Noah?"

Puck's trademark smirk was firmly in place as he answered her. "How bout you skinny dip instead?"

Groaning to herself, Rachel refused to deign him with a response and continued after Quinn into the house. Over her shoulder she heard a splash and a distinctly Puck like "oof" – evidently Mike coming to her defence once again. She smiled to herself.

All happy feelings were wiped away however as Quinn and Santana lead her upstairs and into a bedroom, where a guy in a McKinley high jacket and pretty red head were making out on the bed.

"Get out" said Quinn casually, her tone full of the kind of confidence you only get from having years of people doing whatever you tell them. The guy broke off the kiss and looked up, ready to tell her where to stick it. That was until he realised who it was speaking to him.

His eyes widened. "Sure" he said, dragging the girl off the bed and after him to the door, shooting Quinn a nervous smile on his way out. Quinn didn't return the favour.

"It's one of the perks of being popular" she told Rachel, nodding her head in the retreating couple's direction. "They all do exactly what I say because of my "it" girl status."

Dating the star quarterback of a football team of Neanderthals who'll beat up anyone who gets in their way kind of helps too, thought Rachel sarcastically. She was pretty sure it was the Fear factor that had most guys scurrying after Quinn's every whim.

"Yes" she said out loud. "How nice for you."

Quinn's eyes narrowed. "How long have you and Mike been… friends?" she asked.

Rachel didn't miss the emphasis on the word "friends" and realised this was the Cheerio asking if there was anything going on between her and Mike.

"Since he began participating in glee" she said shortly. Her love life was not up for discussion.

Quinn evidently thought otherwise. "Are you dating?" she asked.

Rachel felt a flare of anger. "No" she said after a moment. "Not that it's any of your business."

Santana raised an eyebrow. "So Mike invited you here just because you're _friends?_"

"Yes. Well, he didn't invite me, Kurt did. But for the sake of the point you're trying to make let's just say that it was Mike."

Quinn and Santana exchanged looks.

"No offense Rachel" said Quinn, in a fake sweet voice that told Rachel she was about to be offended. "But why would Mike take any interest in you whatsoever if you weren't putting out?"

"Because he enjoys my company?" And because he recognises my potential as a star, she thought silently. But she decided not to mention that at this precise moment.

Santana sneered. "I highly doubt that."

"You can believe what you like" said Rachel calmly.

"Ok man hands" said Quinn, tossing her blonde hair over one shoulder and advancing on her. "I'm going to break this down for you. One – you do not fit in with us. Two – Mike is under a serious delusion if he thinks you're even remotely pretty and Three – if you don't leave _right now, _some ugly shit is going to go down."

"Excuse me?" Rachel didn't know whether to laugh or not. Quinn couldn't genuinely be serious, could she? Of course, she wasn't at all surprised that the Cheerio didn't want her befriending Mike. They were so exclusive and hated new people joining their group – not that she wanted to be involved with people who considered popularity to be more important than talent. But actually forcing her to leave?

"You heard me" Quinn threatened. "Get out, or we'll make you."

"Fine. I'll leave." She had no desire to be beaten up and it seemed that Quinn was intent on banishing her from the party. Of course, in the future she'd have bodyguards to deal with this sort of thing, but for now she had to protect her looks from any unwanted damage. As she was heading for the door, Santana called out a departing insult.

"And don't think Puck is even remotely interested in you, manhands. The only reason he talks to you at all is because he's trying to make your life hell."

"Really?" muttered Rachel under her breath, "because I thought that was your job."

As she headed downstairs, very much hoping that Kurt had finished doing whatever it was he was doing to Nate Lawson so they could go home, she bumped into Puck on the landing.

"Two times in one day" he grinned, placing a steadying hand on her waist so she didn't fall over. "Didn't know you liked me this much Berry."

She bristled, half infuriated by his arrogant smirk and half worried what Santana would do if she came out of the bedroom and saw them talking together. "I don't. And I still haven't forgiven you for what happened this morning in registration."

"Whatever. You so enjoyed it."

She sighed. "If you'll excuse me, I have to go." Moving his hand away from her waist, she tried to step past him.

"You leaving already?" he asked, a frown creasing his brow.

"Yes. And if you see Kurt anyway, I'd appreciate it if you told him I'll be waiting by his car."

Rachel walked away, thinking that this whole evening had entirely justified her reasons for never agreeing to anything Kurt suggested.

Puck watched her go, wondering how the hell she managed to look hot in knee socks.

* * *

**A/N: Reviews are much appreciated. I'd love to know what you think! :) **


	4. Birthday Plans

**A/N: thank you again for all the alerts and favourites! **

* * *

It wasn't that she was bossy and high pitched and irritating, or even that she wore the most insanely pleated skirts he'd ever seen in his life. It was the fact that Rachel Berry was becoming an increasingly permanent feature in his life. Which really, when he thought about it (which he seemed to be doing a fucking lot) wasn't all bad. But there were times when even her mouth – which was damn sexy, and he just knew she'd be able to do amazing things with it – couldn't make up for her personality.

"The fuck?" he asked roughly, slamming his locker shut and turning away from her eager face.

Rachel's smile faltered as Puck began striding off down the corridor. She was forced to jog to keep up with him. "I just thought it would be nice, seeing as it's his birthday, to hold some form of celebration –"

"Yeah" said Puck shortly, cutting her off. "He's gunna have a party."

"Have you arranged it, Noah? Because you've got precisely three days."

"It's sorted."

"I highly doubt that" said Rachel reproachfully.

"Well it's none of your business" Puck retorted. He knew it was stupid to be mad at Rachel for wanting to do something for Finn's birthday. In fact, it would take the pressure off him having to organise something if she was involved, but he just couldn't get over the thought of actually _agreeing_ with her.

"Look, I know you find my company completely unbearable" sighed Rachel. "But –"

"I never said that" said Puck quickly, with a slight twinge of guilt.

"You didn't need to say it Noah. I'm perfectly aware how you feel about me" she said sadly.

Puck winced. He didn't hate her or anything – if she knew about the sexy catholic schoolgirl dreams he had about her that would be perfectly clear – but she was so demanding.

"Ok fine. Just organise the damn party Berry" he snapped.

Her face lit up. "Really Noah?"

"Sure. Knock yourself out. Literally – I wouldn't mind."

Rachel decided to ignore this last comment. "And I can invite all the glee club members?"

"Whatever" Puck shrugged. "Just make sure there's plenty of beer."

"Boys!" said Rachel, shaking her head. "You don't need alcohol to have a good time you know."

"Yeah, but it helps when looking at you."

"I'm going to pretend you didn't say that" said Rachel, rolling her eyes. "And I hope you'll help me with the entertainments, because I'm not entirely sure what Finn would want."

"If by entertainment you mean strippers, then I'm way ahead of you" Puck drawled.

"Noah!" Rachel looked scandalised. "Don't you _dare_ engage women of the night to attend my party!"

"Your party?" he raised an eyebrow. "I thought it was Finn's birthday. And don't even get me started on "women of the night". What are you? Ninety?"

"It's what my dads call them" said Rachel, not in the least abashed. "And of course it's Finn's party, but if I'm going to be associated with its inception then I don't want my name tainted with that of prostitutes."

"Strippers aren't prostitutes" he told her. "My seventeenth would have been a hell of a lot more interesting if they were."

"You hired strippers for you seventeenth birthday party?" Rachel was appalled.

"Matt called them" he shrugged, as if that absolved him of everything. Actually, he needed to thank him for that. Two of them had ended up staying the night and it had been fucking amazing. So yeah. Maybe Berry had a point about "women of the night".

"Santana had a fit when they turned up" he said, grinning at the memory.

Rachel shook her head. For the first time ever she felt sympathy for the cheerleader. It couldn't be easy going out with Puck.

"Ok, just leave the entertainment to me" she amended.

"Whatever. So long as we don't have to listen to you sing."

Rachel's face fell. "But I already made a demo for Finn as a present!"

Puck smacked a hand to his forehead. "Kill me now."

"Don't even go there Puckerman" she snapped back. She could handle his mockery of her fashion sense and her dads, but when it came to music she refused to be criticised by someone who thought Barbara Streisand was a lingerie brand.

Puck was smirking. "Was that a threat, Berry?"

"Yes" she said darkly. "I don't care how bad ass you claim to be Noah, but if you doubt my music taste I _will_ have to deal with you."

"Sounds hot."

Rachel groaned. "Why is it that you have to make everything sound dirty?" she demanded.

"It's one of my many skills" he said, following her nonchalantly out into the parking lot. "Wanna find out what the other ones are?"

Rachel shook her head emphatically. "No Noah. I most certainly do not."

"You might enjoy them" he pushed her, getting the satisfaction he was after as her face flushed.

"Be that as it may, I'm not willing to become another one of your one night stands" she told him firmly.

They'd reached her car and Puck leaned casually against the hood. "So you do find me attractive" he grinned.

"We were speaking hypothetically" said Rachel, pulling open the car door and dumping her bags on the back seat. "If you ever used your "skills" on me, then I'm sure I would have a good time. I'm aware of your reputation. But the situation in which that would occur would never happen."

Something deep within Puck's brain riled up at her words. She was flat out rejecting the idea of him. And yeah, he'd gone through this a million times in his head and it all worked out for the best if he didn't go after her. But that was a challenge if ever he'd heard one. And Puckerman's never backed down from a challenge.

"You're so sure about that are you?" he asked, pushing himself off the car and swaggering round to the driver's side. Rachel was putting her seat belt on and didn't answer until she's turned on the engine.

"Yes, I am" she told him. "Now if you'd kindly step away from the vehicle, I'm going to go home."

Puck ignored her and stuck his head in through the open window so there faces were only inches apart. Rachel felt her heart speed up at the proximity, but tried not to let the sudden emotions she was feeling affect her expression. Puck's breath was warm on her cheek as he spoke.

"We'll see about that" he murmured, and with a final smirk he drew his head back and walked away.

Boys! thought Rachel savagely as she put the car into gear. How was it possible that Noah infuriated her to the extent that he did, but whenever he looked at her like that her blood seemed to heat up several degrees? It was ridiculous. And she was determined not to let him affect her like that.

* * *

Puck thought about his encounter with Rachel as he drove home. Why was it that no other girl in school annoyed him as much as she did, but that there was something about her that kept making him go back for more? It was definitely to do with the skirts, he thought abstractedly. They were so short and so god damn tantalising the way they flew up when she did dance moves in glee club. Plus there was the fact that she stood up to him, which was hot in a weird kind of way, especially when she bit on her bottom lip when she got frustrated with him. Then again, she was Rachel Berry. _Rachel Berry._ The girl that he'd slushied pretty much every day of freshman year, the girl that screamed at him dementedly when he forgot lines in songs they were supposed to be learning, the girl that talked so much he wanted to cut his ears off. And then there was the fact that she didn't seem to want him. Everybody wanted him. I mean, had she _seen _his guns? But she'd sat there and said under no circumstances would he ever get into her pants. And it wasn't that he wanted to – ok yeah, who was he kidding? He totally wanted to – but the fact that she was so certain he wouldn't grated at him. He wanted the option.

"Damn it" he growled, executing a highly dangerous three point turn and speeding back in the direction of the nearest store. He needed dip.

No girl had made him think this much since Santana had asked him whether he'd prefer a lap dance or for her and Brittany to make out in front of him for his birthday.

* * *

"So, are you free on Saturday night?" Rachel asked, twiddling the phone cord around her finger.

"For what?" said Kurt, sounding suspicious. "I'm not taking you shopping again. You completely ignored my suggestions last time and bought that _horrendous_ striped suit. I want to marry you off to a zebra every time I see it."

"I happen to like that suit. And not for shopping" Rachel told him, walking over to her bed and sitting down. "For a party."

"Rachel, Sweetie. In the nicest way possible, nobody would come if you threw a party."

She rolled her eyes. "Not for me, Kurt. For Finn."

"Finn?" Kurt's voice perked up. "I'm all ears."

"Well, Noah and I thought it would be nice if –"

"You and Puck?" Kurt cut in, sounding eager. "When were you discussing this?"

"Earlier today" said Rachel, confused by the question. "At school."

"Oh."

Rachel laughed at the disappointment in his voice. "We're just friends, Kurt. If that."

Apart from the fact that he always seems to be around, she thought. And what happened in registration the other day. And the constant innuendo's. But that was just Puck, right?

Kurt sniffed. "Whatever you say."

"Anyway" she continued, shoving all thought's of Noah Puckerman from her mind. "Are you free on Saturday?"

"For Finn, I'm always free. In fact I'm more than free, I'm – "

"Good" said Rachel, cutting him off hastily. "I'll put you name down on the list."

"Who have you asked so far?"

"Tina, Artie, Mike and Matt." She'd phoned Tina and Artie before Kurt and had bumped into Mike and Matt earlier at the store. They'd been having an argument over what type of chips to buy. They'd seemed really keen on the idea of the party and grateful for her input when she suggested they bought a packet of each flavour.

"Rachel, you need more than five guests" Kurt told her.

"I know Kurt. That's why I'm calling the others now. I'll see you tomorrow at school."

"Don't wear that suit."

Rachel hung up and added Kurt to her list. Looking over it, she frowned as she realised she'd put Noah's name at the top.

"Must be going mad" she said out loud, as she dialled Brittany's number. Brittany was the one cheerio that she actually liked and who didn't try and make her life a living hell. She was hoping she could get her to ask Quinn and Santana so she wouldn't have to speak to them. Not that she wanted the other two there, but it seemed a bit rude not to invite Finn's girlfriend to his own party. She never could understand what Finn saw in her. Finn was sweet and kind and funny and even though Quinn was the head cheerleader and he was the star quarterback, they had nothing in common. She liked to think of Finn more as a leading man. He was the one guy in glee who could keep up with her vocally (except perhaps Puck, but he slacked off too much to be given the solos) and she had always envisioned that at some point in the future they would get together. If Quinn ever took her claws out of him that was. Brittany's voice interrupted her musings.

"Hello?"

"Hi Brit. It's Rachel."

"Oh hey Rach. I was just thinking about you."

Rachel smiled at how cheerful Brittany sounded. "How come?"

"Well I saw this cow when I was driving home and I remembered what you said about not having dairy products before singing. You know, because it affects your vocal chords? So I was wondering if burgers counted in that."

"No Brit, burgers are made from meat."

"Oh. Awesome."

Rachel laughed. It was a miracle that Brittany passed any of her classes, but she was so sweet it was impossible not to feel happy when talking to her.

"Anyways, what did you want?" Brittany asked.

"Are you free on Saturday night?"

"Hold on, let me check."

There was a clunk sound as Brittany put the phone down and Rachel began doodling on the page in front of her as she waited for her to come back. Why had she put Noah at the top of the list? It was probably because she'd been talking to him earlier. And because they were supposed to be organising the party together, although she highly doubted he was actually going to contribute anything to it. But she usually put her own name first on things.

"Rach?"

Rachel looked away from the paper. "Hey."

"I'm back."

"I realised that Brit."

"Oh. Well, I am free on Saturday. You need help with Mike?"

"What?" Rachel was taken aback.

"Well I figured you wanted a girl's night in so I could give you advice." Brittany sounded matter of fact. "He likes you too, you know."

"I – no – well, that's not what this is about." Though she felt a small rush of pleasure at Brittany's words, she wasn't really sure how to deal with it. She liked Mike, but he was only a friend. And much too concerned with snacks to be a viable boyfriend option.

"Ok. So what did you want to do?"

"I'm organising a party for Finn" said Rachel, getting back into business mode. "It's going to be held at Noah's house and all the glee club members are coming."

"Great!" said Brittany. "I'll be there. Did you want me to book the stripers?"

"No!" Rachel was indignant all over again. "There are going to be no stripers present. Would you really feel comfortable if they were?" she asked curiously.

She could sense the other girls shrug. "They were there at Puck's party. I thought that's what all boys did for their seventeenth birthdays. Plus stripers are hot."

Rachel opened her mouth to speak, then closed it again. She wasn't entirely sure about Brittany's orientation, but this seemed to imply that the rumours about her and Santana were true.

"Not all boys" she told the other girl firmly. "And definitely not Finn."

"Does he not like stripers?" Brittany asked.

"No he doesn't. Not all boys are as vulgar as Noah."

"Not all guys are as gorgeous as Puck either."

Rachel closed her eyes in silent prayer. Why did all conversations seem to come back to Puck? It was the last thing she needed. Or wanted.

"Perhaps" she said. "But that doesn't make him a nice person."

"But he_ is_ nice" said Brittany in surprise. "He's the only guy that listens to my stories about Chewy."

"_Who_?"

"My hamster. Matt and Mike don't care and Finn's always too busy with Quinn to listen."

"The fact that he once listened to you talk about your hamster doesn't mean he's a good guy" Rachel insisted. She wasn't sure why she was so adamant to prove that Noah wasn't nice. But she had a distinct notion that it had something to do with wanting to keep away from him. It would be so much easier if she knew he really was the sex obsessed jerk he came across as. Which deep down she knew he wasn't.

"It wasn't just one time" Brittany corrected her. "He brings me dip after cheerio's practise and drives me home. I tell him about Chewy then. And he always walks me to my door."

"Probably because he wants you to invite him in" said Rachel sourly.

"No, we only had sex once" said Brittany cheerfully. "And that was years ago. He walks me to my door because he knows I'm scared of my neighbour's cat."

"Oh." Rachel wasn't sure what to think after that, about Puck or Brittany's sanity.

Brittany seemed to take her lack of response as disappointment and hurried to assure her otherwise. "Not that he wasn't good Rach! He's one of the best I've had. But we're just friends."

"Well that's nice." Rachel's brain was trying to acclimatise to the notion of Puck being friends with a girl rather than using them for sex. It was distinctly out of character and most unsettling.

"Was there anything else you wanted?" Brittany asked. "Because I've got to go meet San."

"Umm, yes." Rachel tried to shake herself out of her thoughts. "Would you ask her and Quinn if they want to come to the party?"

"Sure thing. See you later Rach!"

"Bye Brit."

Ending the call, Rachel lay back against her pillow will a groan. Why was the universe trying to change her opinion of Noah? It was easy to hate him when he was obnoxious and sexist. But stories about him chauffeuring Brittany around and protecting her from neighbouring animals made her want to smile. And the last few days his comments towards her, though as crass as usual, had seemed more flirtatious. It was harder to ignore his obvious sex appeal when he behaved like that. She sighed, staring up at the gold stars stuck to her ceiling. Tomorrow he would probably slushy her and everything would be back to normal.

Her phone beeped, indicating a new message. She flipped it open, expecting it to be from one of her dad's but instead Noah's name flashed up. Trying to ignore the kick of adrenaline it produced, she took a deep breath and read the text.

_Yo, I've bought the beer for the party, but food and music is up to you. No weird Broadway shit though, or I'm throwing myself under a bus and you'd be left to explain it to my mom. _

Amused and annoyed in equal measure, Rachel closed her eyes and tried to think of anything other than Noah Puckerman.

* * *

**As always, reviews would be much appreciated! **


	5. Makeover

**A/N: again, thanks for all the alerts and favourites! Keep em' coming ;) **

* * *

Puck pulled on a sweater, grabbed his keys off the kitchen table and made for the front door. Calling out a quick "Later!" to his mom and sister, he slammed out the house and jogged across the lawn to his truck. It was half eleven and he was running late.

It was Saturday morning and in keeping with tradition, the guys were going round Finn's for his annual birthday breakfast. When they were younger this had consisted of chocolate milk and waffles and they'd all dressed up in super hero costumes because Matt's dad had once told them that birthday's were the most likely times to develop super powers. Now they were older Finn's mom made them mountains of pancakes and then left them to it to get drunk. They didn't go in for dressing up any more either, apart from Mike, who always wore his superman t-shirt in honour of the occasion. Puck had got really pissed off the first year they'd stopped wearing them as he'd loved his spider man outfit, but Mrs Hudson had given him extra maple syrup and calmed him down (don't judge. He was a guy that liked his syrup).

As he parked on the curb outside Finn's, Puck grinned at the sight of Matt and Mike staggering up the path to the door weighed down by four crates of beer.

"Yo! You need any help?" he called, getting out of the truck and following after them.

"Hey man" said Mike, "can you ring the bell for us?"

"My arms are about to drop off" put in Matt. As well as beer, he was carrying a monster sized bag of cheetos and his football helmet – it was a longstanding joke between them that they had to eat chips out of it at parties. Puck wasn't entirely sure where that tradition had started, but it had to be respected.

He gave the helmet a fond pat before pressing the doorbell. "So you guys coming tonight?" he asked.

Mike nodded. "Yeah, dude. Rach told us about it the other day."

"_Rach_?" Puck frowned at him, his good mood evaporating. "Since when did you call Berry by her nickname?"

"Since she got hot" Mike grinned, shifting the weight of the beer so he didn't drop it.

"What do you mean, since she got hot?" Puck demanded. She's always been hot, he added silently. Chang would have to be God damn blind not to have noticed it by now.

"Look, I know you don't like her man" Mike grimaced, "and I know you think she's a loser, but she's not that bad. Plus she's got a smokin' body."

Well fuck. You think he didn't know that? Out loud he snorted and turned away.

"Whatever, dude. Just don't come crying to me when she goes all psycho on your ass."

Mike grinned. "Cool. So what time you want us to get there tonight anyway?"

"Seven" he grunted, keeping his eyes on the door. The thought of Mike liking Rachel, asking Rachel out, made him want to punch something. She was fucking Rachel Berry. Guys weren't supposed to like her. She was supposed to be all focused on her music career and shit, not flirting around with idiots like Chang. Plus if they started dating, then she she'd be off limits. Not that he cared about that of course (yeah, who was he kidding).

But despite the amount of time he spent thinking about her – and it wasn't just fantasies about her barely-functional skirts either, recently he'd found himself having dreams about them singing together, and that was so not badass – he hadn't been planning on doing anything about it. Because there was no way in hell she'd be cool with a hook up. And he didn't do relationships.

"Hey dude, what's up?" Matt raised an eyebrow at his Puck's dark expression.

"Nothing. I'm just –"

It was at this moment that Finn pulled open the door, grinning manically.

"What took you so long? I said eleven!" he said, standing back so the other guys could get in. "Woah, beer much?"

"You know what Puck's like" said Mike, staggering over the threshold with his crates. "I bet he was still in bed ten minutes ago."

"You weren't exactly punctual either" Puck grumbled, his mind drawn helplessly to Rachel and her gold stars for attendance. He was so fucking screwed.

"Well my mom's made a stack of pancakes" Finn told them. "Bring everything through to the kitchen."

Puck shook himself out of his thoughts as he took a seat at the table. He didn't need Berry ruining every single god damn minute of his life, especially on his best friend's birthday. As he reached across to get a plate, he punched Finn lightly on the shoulder.

"Happy Birthday, man. Have a good one."

Finn smiled happily. "Thanks dude. I feel old."

"Yeah, I think I can spot a few wrinkles" chimed in Mike, who was pouring copious amounts of chocolate sauce over his pancakes.

"And some grey hairs" said Matt, through a mouthful of cream.

"What?" Finn looked panicked. "Are you being serious?"

The three boys cracked up as Finn jumped to his feet and ran over to check his face in the mirror.

"So what you get for your birthday?" Matt asked him as he returned to the table, patting his hair self consciously.

Finn shrugged. "Don't know yet. I'm getting my presents later."

Puck snorted. "Which is mom talk for "totally forgot to get the little brat anything, I better haul my ass to the mall"".

Finn grabbed a lemon off the table and chucked it at his head. "Shut it Puckerman"

He ducked hastily, thinking that it was kind of sweet that Mrs H actually believed they were going to put fruit on their pancakes when there was chocolate sauce on offer.

"So you want to come over tonight?" he asked Finn casually.

Rachel had decided that the party should be a surprise, so he'd been given the task of getting Finn to his house that night without him suspecting anything. Which shouldn't be too hard seeing as it was Finn. He'd called Mrs H up the evening before to make sure he wasn't doing anything with the family (yeah, he'd left it kind of late to be checking that sort of thing, but what Berry didn't know, didn't hurt). Mrs H had been down with it all so he was green lit apart from actually getting Finn to turn up.

"Me and Mike were thinking a couple rounds of Halo. You know, kind of like a rite of passage or some shit. Every seventeen year old has to have their ass kicked at x-box before they become a man."

Finn nodded. "Sounds good dude. Apart from the kicking ass bit. I'm so going to own you."

"In your dreams Hudson."

With his job done Puck sat back and finished off his pancakes, trying his best not to think about what Rachel might be wearing to the party.

The rest of the morning was spent drinking beer and seeing who could shove the most cheeto's down their pants (yeah it's immature and he's not proud of it, but – what the fuck's he saying? he's totally proud of it). Then they gave Finn the birthday bumps, which consisted of them chasing him round the house until they'd punched him seventeen times – Mike pointed out that this probably wasn't the best present, but seeing as his mom hadn't got him anything Puck felt they'd come out tops.

"I gotta go" he told Finn when he felt he'd sobered up enough to be able to get home without killing anyone. "My mom and Sarah are going to stay with my aunt and they want me to drive them."

It was true that they were going out of town, but they'd actually left that morning. What he needed to do was go home and sort shit out for that night.

"Okay" grinned Finn, who was on to his eighth beer and at the stage where he was finding everything really funny. "What time you getting back? You know, so we don't come round to play x-box and find a completely empty house". He started chuckling, like it would be the most hilarious fucking thing in the world.

Puck rolled his eyes. "About half seven. Don't let him drink anymore" he added to the room at large.

"It's cool, we're all out" said Matt. "See you later."

"Later."

As Puck drove home, he tried to convince himself that the reason he'd wanted to throw a slushy in Mike's face all day wasn't because he hated the idea of him and Rachel being friends, but because of some other much more plausible reason (which he hadn't come up with yet). So what if they got close? It wasn't like his Thing for Berry actually meant anything; he was obviously just in need of a good lay. It had been a week since he'd last hooked up with Santana and having nothing but his hand for company was clearly causing him to have sexy and deluded fantasies.

But that didn't explain why he was still looking forward to just spending time with her, which was probably the most lame ass thing he'd ever thought in his life. Apart from the fact that their arguments and the lectures kind of turned him on, he also enjoyed being around her. Sure, things were never peaceful, but who the hell needed peace anyway?

Which got him right back to what the fuck he actually wanted. Sex, definitely. But his reasoning up till now for not sleeping with her had been that she'd go crazy on him afterwards and probably demand to start dating. Which he was totally against.

So why did the idea of Mike dating her cause his stomach to churn up like he'd just eaten a bad enchilada?

Ten minutes later when he pulled into his drive, he still didn't have an answer.

* * *

Rachel sat on her bed, tapping her foot impatiently as Kurt riffled through her wardrobe. He'd arrived unannounced half an hour earlier under the pretence of "just dropping in for a chat", when she was fully aware that the real motivation behind his visit had been so he could pick out an outfit for her to wear that night. Something she was _certain_ she didn't need his help with, as his idea of party clothes usually involved some form of faux fur or leopard print.

For the last thirty minutes she'd been forced to sit there listening to him moan weakly over her own choice (a black top and chequered blue skirt) and then proceed to bulldoze his way through her entire collection of dresses trying to find something he deemed suitably sexy enough for the occasion. So no, she was _not_ having a good afternoon.

"God, Rach. What were you thinking?" Kurt asked, holding up a light grey trouser suit and wiggling it in her face. "It might have been fashionable in, I don't know, the nineteen eighties."

Yes, this was _exactly_ what she needed right now.

"That I would look smart and presentable for school" she replied stiffly, not appreciating the way he was wrinkling his nose in distaste as he threw the offending item on to the "reject" pile. "And I wouldn't have thought about wearing it to the party anyway. I don't see what's wrong with the outfit I'd already chosen."

Kurt turned to her face her and raised an eyebrow. "Sweetie. How do you expect to keep Puck interested if you insist on wearing clothes that do absolutely nothing to emphasise your curves?"

Rachel gaped. "What do you mean, keep Puck interested? He was never interested in the first place! And what makes you think I'd want to keep him interested even if he was? Which he definitely isn't." She was aware that she was babbling and blushed slightly at the knowing smirk that had appeared on Kurt's face.

"The lady doth protest too much" he told her sagely.

"I am not" she said, with as much dignity as she could manage. "I'm protesting exactly the right amount."

Kurt rolled his eyes theatrically. "You are _so _difficult to deal with."

It wasn't like this was the first time Rachel had been told this, but it was usually due to her trying to take over things during glee. She was sure that aside from when she was attempting to create the perfect performance, she was actually very agreeable to be around.

"What do you mean?" she frowned.

"Some people just refuse to admit their feelings" said Kurt over his shoulder, as he set to work on her shoe collection.

"I don't _have_ feelings for Noah" she told him resolutely, though in the back of her mind she couldn't help but think of the way he'd stuck his head through her car window the other day and completely thrown her with his smirk and his closeness – she remembered the feel of his breath, warm against her cheek – and his lovely, musky smell. Oh God.

"You can deny them all you like Rachel" Kurt sniffed, "but you'd have to be completely cold blooded not to find him attractive. He's a gorgeous specimen of a man, if slightly crude at times, and on top of everything else he evidently likes you too."

"What?" Rachel felt her heart skip a few beats. Was this just one of Kurt's ridiculous attempts to hook people up? Or did he actually have evidence? Had Puck admitted this himself? She bit her tongue to stop herself from asking any of these questions out loud. This was Noah Puckerman she was thinking about. Even if he had expressed a complimentary sentiment about her, it would only be in the hope of getting into her pants. Which was something that she was determinedly telling herself she didn't want.

"Rachel" said Kurt, in a tone that suggested he was about to impart wisdom to somebody incredibly stupid. "He dragged you into registration the other day looking like he'd rather be dragging you into bed. He clearly has feelings for you."

Shocked, she opened her mouth to speak but Kurt held a hand up to stop her.

"And I know you said that the only reason he did that was to embarrass you, but why would he go to such great lengths when he could have just slushied you and be done with it? He wanted to spend time with you."

"Maybe his mode of bullying has just become more sophisticated?"

"You know that's ridiculous. Not only because I doubt Puck can even spell sophisticated let alone think like it."

"That's hardly fair" she said, not entirely sure why she was coming to Puck's defence but seemingly unable to prevent herself. "He's actually very intelligent, but refuses to focus his talent on his education."

"Have you noticed that you do that a lot?" asked Kurt, smugly.

"Do what?"

"Stand up for him whenever other people put him down. You complain about him constantly to me, but if ever somebody else criticises him, woe betide them."

"I – really don't know what you're talking about. I've never –" Rachel stammered.

"Look" said Kurt, cutting across her. "Why don't we put it to the test? I'll give you a make over for the party tonight and, though I say so myself, you'll look so gorgeous that if Puck really does like you, he won't be able to stop himself from showing you just how much. If he does nothing, you'll know for sure that he doesn't. What do you think?"

Rachel instinctively wanted to say no immediately and run screaming from the building – Kurt's plans tended to have that effect on her – but maybe, for the first time in his life, it wasn't such a bad idea. Recently she did seem to have developed a strange fixation with Puck and whether this was due to her own sexual frustration or the fact that he appeared to be acting differently towards her, it was evident that she needed to do something about it. Kurt's make-over plan would, if nothing else, confirm that he had no feelings for her. Because she was quite certain that even if Kurt made her look as gorgeous as he claimed he could, Puck wouldn't look twice at her if Santana or one of the other cheerio's was offering herself up to him.

And maybe proving this to herself would stop him from filling her thoughts.

"Ok" she said out-loud. "Make me over."

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**ahhhh it's all kicking off! haha **

**Would love to know what you think! **


	6. Surprises

**A/N: thank you for all the support i've got for this story :) **

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When there was an impatient knocking at the door at half six, Puck expected it to be Rachel turning up insanely early to organise things. Which, considering the fact that she'd already phoned him thirteen times that afternoon to make sure that he'd bought enough food and drinks and had successfully got Finn to attend without giving the game away, was a pretty natural assumption.

So when he pulled open the door and saw Quinn standing there with a hand on her hip and a "you'd better start explaining yourself" kind of look on her face, what he felt wasn't disappointment, but surprise. At least, that's what he told himself anyway.

"What you doing here?" he asked, leaning against the doorframe and raising an eyebrow at the cheerio. "Party starts at seven and Finn's not getting here until half past."

Quinn rolled her eyes – something she did frequently in his presence. "I know that dumbass. Just let me in already."

Unwillingly Puck stepped back to let her past and Quinn stalked into the hallway, dropping her bag at the foot of the stairs as she headed on in to the kitchen. He closed the door and followed after her, wondering what the hell she wanted. Yeah they hung out at school, but he wasn't stupid enough to think that their friendship was based on anything other than the fact that he was in the football team and she could use this to cultivate her popularity. She came to him whenever she needed a kid dealt with – slushied, dumpstered or beat up depending on what they'd done to offend her – or if she wanted him to stop flirting with a certain cheerio because she was trying to cut them out of the team. He always agreed, because being on good terms with the head cheerleader meant that girls lower down the pyramid – pun definitely intended – who were trying to work their way up the McKinley high social ladder would try and use him to increase their status. And by use he meant have sex with. Which, duh, he was totally cool with. Exploitation never felt so good.

He and Quinn had even hooked up a couple times before she'd managed to pussy whip Finn into a relationship, but they didn't exactly do the whole talking thing. So he was guessing this wasn't a social call.

When he entered the kitchen Quinn leant against the counter and folded her arms.

"I was just on the phone to Brit" she told him, her voice accusatory, "and she seems to be under the deluded impression that the entirety of the glee club are going to be at this party tonight. Whatever could have made her think something like that Puck?"

He tried to ignore the fact that her eyes was zeroed in on his face like it was a target – seriously, she was kind of scary when she got pissed and kept his expression casual.

"Maybe because they are?"

Quinn took a menacing step forward and if he hadn't been such a badass, he would have instinctively taken one back.

"And you're ok with this are you?" she asked coldly. "Or, don't tell me, you _invited them yourself_?"

He shrugged. "Rachel did, but I'm cool with them being here. It's Finn's birthday and he's friends with all of them. Why shouldn't they be here?"

"You let manhands sort out the invite list? No wonder it's full of losers." Quinn spat. "In fact, I'm surprised she had anybody to ask. It's not like she has any friends."

Puck felt a surge of anger at the way she was talking about Rachel and had to clench his fists in order to stop himself from growling back at her (And Mr Schue said he had no self-control). There was only a small part of his brain that noted the fact he was about to defend Rachel; the rest of his attention was taken up with the smirking girl in front of him.

"Just because she hangs out with people you don't give a shit about doesn't mean they're not her friends" he ground out. Rachel might be a freaking pain in the ass and completely demented when it came to glee club, but she didn't deserve to be bitched about. In fact, she didn't deserve a lot of things – the first of which was Mike Chang sniffing round her every god damn second (actually, screw that. _Chang_ didn't deserve _her.) _

Quinn's smile turned mocking. "Jesus, Puckerman. I didn't realise you cared so much. Do you feel like this about all the people you slushy?"

He felt a stab of guilt, because yeah, up until a few months ago nothing could have given him more satisfaction than watching Rachel Berry wipe ice out of her hair. But this might have had more to do with the fact that the melting water turned her tops see-through (he knew her bra collection pretty fucking well by now).

And he'd stopped doing it, hadn't he? One day she'd been standing by her locker, biting down on her bottom lip in a way that had made him want to do things to her until she forgot her own name and he just hadn't been able to chuck the drink he was holding over her. Since then Ben Jacob Israel had been getting more than his fair share of slushy facials to make up for it, but the point was, since he'd stopped humiliating her every day, he'd actually started to get to know her. And there was something about her – something which Mike fucking Chang had obviously noticed too – was pretty awesome.

"Look" he said Quinn, slightly surprised that it had taken him this long to figure it out. "Rachel's cool, ok? And it's my house and my party, so you're just going to have to deal."

Quinn's eyes narrowed and she opened her mouth to speak, but before he could tell her to just leave already, she was closing it again and smiling brightly at him.

"Ok. Well, I suppose it'd better let you get on" she told him cheerfully. "I have to go pick Santana up and then we'll be back at half seven. See you later."

Puck gaped as she walked past him and out into the hall. At the stairs she picked her bag up and then called out a departing goodbye over her shoulder before closing the front door behind her.

He watched her pull out of his drive from the window, trying to figure out what the shit had just happened. He knew it was an act – Quinn was obsessed with the hierarchy and she wouldn't take his acceptance of Rachel lying down – but he couldn't work out what her angle was.

He guessed she'd make it clear to him that night. But whatever. He was a stud. He could deal with it.

* * *

Rachel sat in the passenger seat of Kurt's car, trying to the best of her abilities to keep her breathing steady.

It should be something she was used to considering the amount of vocal exercises she went through each morning before school, but for some reason the thought of everybody – and by everybody she meant the boys, and by the boys she meant Puck – seeing her in this pathetic excuse for a dress that Kurt had put her in, was causing her to hyperventilate.

"Stop fiddling with it. It's fine" Kurt berated her, for about the millionth time that night.

She ignored him.

"It has no straps" she moaned, hitching the dress up to cover as much of her exposed chest as was possible. It wasn't really that she was nervous about whether she looked good or not. Kurt was true to his word and she was well aware that the bright red colour of the dress contrasted strikingly with her dark eyes and hair. It was made of a stretchy material that clung to her curves and gave her a much more spectacular cleavage than her cardigans and jumpers usually allowed for and the fact that the dress barely brushed the top of her thighs – _Oh God_, perhaps Kurt would open a window so she could get some air – only enhanced the effect. But this was where she was concerned.

"I look like a slut" she informed him, now trying to breath through her nose to see if that might calm the queasy feeling in her stomach. "I look utterly desperate!"

"For god sake Rachel." Kurt had had enough. "Quinn and Santana wear less than that to school on a regular basis and nobody calls them sluts."

She turned her head and looked at him pointedly.

"Ok fine, they do" he conceded. "But it's not because of their clothes, or lack thereof. And I can guarantee you that every other girl there tonight will be wearing something just as revealing. It's a _party_. You're supposed to look desirable."

"This dress doesn't say "desirable"" she snapped. "Desirable implies a certain degree of subtlety. This dress screams "take me now"".

"Isn't that the idea, sweetie?" asked Kurt, raising an eyebrow.

Rachel felt herself flush the same colour as her dress.

"No! This is simply a test – I don't want anything to happen, I'm merely trying to ascertain if _he_ wants anything to happen. Which I'm perfectly aware that he doesn't. I'm just trying to prove it to myself so I can stop..." she trailed off. She wasn't sure if she wanted Kurt knowing just how much she thought about Noah.

"Ah yes" said Kurt, turning to look at her (she barked at him to keep his eyes on the road). "I forgot about your total inability to recognise that Puck has feelings for you."

Rachel ignored this, as the words sent her head spinning in a direction that she shouldn't allow herself to consider.

Five minutes later and they had pulled up outside Puck's house – she'd been there only once before when she was much younger and her father's had thought it would be a nice idea for her to meet some other Jewish children in the neighbourhood (it hadn't gone well).

So she was momentarily distracted by an interest in what his house looked like; average size, two floors with a skylight in the roof that suggested he had an attic – she wondered idly if that was where he slept, before the thought of him _in bed_ actually registered, causing her nerves to flood back again.

Without her really noticing where she was going, Kurt was shepherding her over the front lawn (which was already strewn with beer cans) and had rung the front door. Her heart was pounding so hard by the time that Brittany pulled it open, letting warm light pour out onto the porch and light up the surrounding darkness, that she thought she might be sick.

"Rach, you look amazing!" Brittany smiled as she pulled her into a hug, while Kurt looked at her in a told-you-so kind of way. She still had enough sense to register that Brittany was wearing a sparkly silver dress that was just as short as hers and this seemed to relax her breathing, so by the time they got into the kitchen she was feeling almost normal.

"Want a rum and coke?" the cheerio asked her, having to shout over the loud music that was pumping from a set of iPod speakers in the corner. It looked like her music suggestions weren't going to be necessary.

Rachel was about to shake her head when she thought better of it. She didn't usually consume alcohol, but right now a little bit of Dutch courage might not be a bad thing.

"Yes please" she said, allowing Brittany to mix her a strong drink.

With a glass in her hand she felt like she was playing a role and this, more than anything Kurt could have said to her, calmed her anxiety. Once she'd downed at least half the drink in one gulp she looked round to find that Brittany had drifted away to where Santana was flirting with a guy by the patio doors. Kurt was already preoccupied, deep in conversation with Mercedes – she tried to ignore how often Puck's name seemed to come up in their conversation and the way Mercedes' eyes kept flicking over towards her.

She was about to go and strike up a conversation with Artie and Tina, who were looking somewhat out of place next to a group of rowdy guys from the football team playing beer pong, when an arm wrapped around her waist and Mike was kissing her on the cheek.

"Wow, Rach! You look – wow."

She giggled (apparently the alcohol had gone straight to her head) and thanked him, noticing that when he pulled away from the hug his fingers lingered on her hip for a few seconds longer than was necessary. The conversation she'd had the other day with Brittany suddenly popped into her head. _I thought you wanted help with Mike – he likes you too, you know. _And even though she didn't like Mike in that way, it was nice to see that her make-over was at least having an effect on someone.

"Where's Finn?" she asked him, thinking that considering it was his birthday, it would be polite to go and wish him many happy returns before she did anything else.

Mike shrugged. "Not here yet. Puck told us to turn up half an hour early so that we'd all be here when he arrived."

"He actually took my advice" she said in surprise. "I told him to get everybody here first so it would create more of an impact on Finn when he came in. I didn't think he'd actually do it though."

"And he got loads of snacks" said Mike appreciatively. "Got to admit, he knows how to throw a good party. Anyway Rach," he was suddenly looking very serious and he had stepped forward so that their bodies were almost touching. He reached out to tuck a loose curl behind her ear. "You really do look amazing."

She was more than slightly uncomfortable by his sudden proximity and the intensity of his gaze, so decided she needed to take evasive action. She forced herself to smile.

"Thanks Mike. It's sweet of you to say so. But do you know where Noah is? I have to make sure he's got everything under control."

Mile dropped his hand, looking disappointed. "Sure. I think he's outside. You want me to take you?"

"No, I'm sure I'll manage."

Rachel turned away from his sulky expression and walked over to the backdoor, ignoring the snide look Santana shot her as she passed. As she stepped out on to the veranda she felt a sense of resolution wash over her. It was good that she was getting it over and done with and letting Puck see her outfit now. It had been the intended aim of the evening after all.

She was aware that the whole thing was ridiculous. She knew that Puck irritated her beyond belief and, if his year's of slushying were anything to go by, that he felt exactly the same way. But he'd let her organise this party, and the little – moments? (she wasn't entirely sure what to call them) – they'd had over the last week had made her start to think that behind the crassness and insults, there was a person she could like a lot. The fact that he had certain physical attributes that she would have to be practically dead to ignore just made it all the more easy to want him to notice her. To want him full stop.

He was sitting in a lawn chair with his feet propped up on the rail in front of him, head tipped back and eyes closed. She almost didn't want to disturb him, but when she shut the door behind her, he looked up.

"Rachel?" His voice was husky and it caused a warmth that had absolutely nothing to do with the alcohol spread across her skin.

"Hi."

He brought his feet down to the ground – she noticed that he was barefoot – and turned properly to face her. The moon had bleached all the colour from the evening so his face was a study in shadows, dark apart from his eyes, which were reflecting the silvery light of the stars. He looked her slowly up and down and in any other context she would have berated him for being so sleazy. But right now, it was kind of the point. So she stood still, holding her breath.

"Fuck Rach. You look stunning."

The sound of his low curse caused the butterflies in her tummy to disappear. A dull ache between her thighs took their place. His eyes were now on her face and she was surprised that she hadn't dropped his gaze. He was looking at her through hooded lids in a way that would ordinarily have caused her to blush.

"Thanks" she said softly.

"So, you think Finn's going to like the party?"

Puck's attempt at small talk made her smile.

"Yes Noah. He's going to love it. You've done a great job."

Silence fell between them and she began to shiver as a cool breeze blew across the back yard.

"C'mere."

Puck was patting the seat next to him and after a slight hesitation, she walked over and slid into it. Once she was settled, he wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

"Better?" he asked, his tone full of something she couldn't quite recognise.

She could feel the heat radiating off him and it took all her will power not to turn and bury her face into his neck. Half her mind was taken up with thoughts of what his lips would feel like against hers and the other (rational) half was wondering how he had managed to sit out here with only a t-shirt on. She knew which half her body was responding to as she leaned in closer to him.

"Much better."

He began to trace patterns on her shoulder with his fingers and the places where he touched her bare skin seemed to tingle with a million nerve endings.

"What are you doing out here Rachel?" he asked quietly.

Her answer was painfully truthful.

"I – came to see you."

If it hadn't been dark she wasn't sure she would have been so bold. But the fact that he couldn't see her blush or read the expression in her eyes, was allowing her to say the things she'd been stopping herself from thinking all week.

Puck spoke into her hair, his mouth just above her ear. "To ask about Finn or for something else?"

She felt the urgency in his question and closed her eyes, trying to keep her breathing steady. "I think you know the answer to that."

"Rach…" he groaned her name and then his hand had moved to the back of her neck so he could gently turn her face towards his. She was lost in his eyes, his own pupils dilated and dark with something she'd never seen in them before. His other hand came up to cup her cheek and her lips parted in surprise as he started to lean in.

"Puck!"

Santana's voice caused them both to jump and him to pull back. His hands fell away, leaving Rachel free to turn and see the Latina girl coming through the backdoor, her expression impatient. She couldn't think straight to really take her in. Her heart was racing, her cheek burning from his touch.

Santana's eyes swept over the scene in front of her and she arched an eyebrow.

"I need you inside" she told Puck, blanking Rachel completely. "I'll be in the den."

A second later she was gone and there was silence save for the low pounding of music that was coming from the house. Rachel felt suddenly exposed and folded her arms across her chest. A chill was spreading through her body, causing goosebumps to erupt on her arms.

Puck ran a hand over his head. "Look. Stay here, ok? I'll be right back."

He got up and leaned in to press a kiss to her forehead before following Santana inside.

She watched him go, feeling the rejection like a crushing weight on her chest. His words echoed round her head. _Stay here. _

Stay there. To be what exactly? Second best? A consolation prize when he'd had enough of Santana?

She sat for a moment longer, trying to ignore the tears that were filling her eyes, blurring her vision.

Then she got up and left.

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Puck walked through the house, ignoring the laughter and dancing of the people around him, in search of Rachel.

When he'd got back to the veranda and found her gone, the first thing he'd thought was that she must have gone to get a drink. Which was kind of stupid seeing as he'd just come through the kitchen and she hadn't been there, but fuck it, he wasn't thinking straight. He hadn't been thinking straight since there nearly-but-not-quit cock blocked by Santana moment.

On top of that, fucking nobody seemed to have seen where she'd disappeared to. He'd have thought that the guys as least would have been paying attention to her in that dress (_that dress)_ that had him wanting to go up to his room and knock one out there and then – if Brittany and Matt had finished making out in there anyways. But most of them had shrugged and told him to try a different room and Finn had just laughed and shook his head, too excited by the fact that he'd been thrown a party to notice anything else (Puck would have been happy that he was enjoying it, if he hadn't been so intent on finding Rachel and kissing her like he should have done shitting _months_ ago).

Because seeing her looking so insanely beautiful had made him realise what a fucking idiot he'd been.

He'd spent weeks thinking about her; sometimes because he wanted to set himself on fire after she bitched out at him and sometimes because he felt guilty that he'd snapped at her, but _always_ because she was driving him crazy with her short skirts and amazing legs and gorgeous eyes. And all of this had led him where? Not going after her as he didn't want to be in a relationship. Which was ridiculous, because the amount of time he'd spent trying to decide whether sleeping with her would be worth the hassle had completely destroyed his game, so he might as well have been dating her anyway.

She shouted at him, she refused to give up when she wanted something her own way and she drove him shit crazy. But the truth of it was, he actually looked forward to his run ins with her. He loved the way she stamped her foot when he said something particularly aggravating and how scandalised she looked whenever he swore. He knew that half the reason why he spent his time annoying her was because it was the only way he got to talk to her.

So he needed to get his ass in gear and stop trying to avoid what the universe was practically shoving in his face – the fact that Rachel Berry was perfect for him.

He knew that this realisation would whip up a shit storm. If Santana's earlier reaction was anything to go by, he wasn't going to be popular with the cheerio's for a while.

_The second he'd walked into the den she'd grabbed his arm and pulled him over into a corner. _

"_What do you want, San?"_

_Santana smirked and pressed herself against him. "What do you think?" she murmured. _

_Not even stopping to think about it, he'd pushed her away. "Not now. As a matter of fact, not ever. Whatever this is that we had, it's over." _

_Her eyes narrowed. "What the hell Puckerman?" _

_He didn't care that when most people got Santana Lopez looking at them like that, they apologised immediately – for anything and everything. He just needed to get back to Rachel as quick as humanly possible. _

"_I'm done, ok? You can keep fucking as many guys as you like, but I'm through with you." _

"_This is because of manhands isn't it?" Santana hissed. "Fucking unbelievable. I should have listened to Quinn." _

"_What's Quinn got to do with it?"_

"_She said you liked her. Of course, I didn't believe at first. Couldn't believe that even you could be quite so stupid." _

"_You're a bitch, you know that?" he growled. _

_Santana laughed nastily. "Yeah. But at least I'm not hung up on a freakin' musical midget." _

_He didn't even bother to reply, just turned and walked away. _

"_Fine!" Santana called. " Go back to her. But don't come crying to me when she won't put out and you need sex." _

So yeah. It didn't look like they were going to bake him a cake.

But Finn would be on his side – he'd always thought Rachel was nice, had told him so every time he'd chucked a slushy in her face. And he'd just been too fucking blind to realise the truth in what he was saying until now (because yeah, it didn't happen very often, but sometimes Finn was actually right).

He was starting to get really frustrated. She couldn't have gone home – he knew that she'd got a lift with Hummel, and as he'd just seen him all over Nate Lawson in the kitchen, he was very much still here.

Walking back out of the den – no sight of her there, just Santana looking like she wanted to rip his balls off – he was distracted by the sound of Matt's booming laugh and turning, that's when he saw her.

She was standing a few feet away from Matt in the doorway that led into his mom's study. Though she was facing away from him, but there was no mistaking that dress.

Or what she was doing.

Her arms were wrapped tightly around Mike's neck and they were kissing, Mike's hands running through her hair, down to the small of her back so he could press her body tighter against his.

Puck felt as if somebody had punched him in the gut. It was one of those weird moments when time seemed to stretch out and he just stood there staring at Rachel, his chest constricting with every second that passed and she didn't break away from Mike.

And then he silently turned and walked away.

Because really, what else was there to do except get so drunk that he passed out?

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**Cliffhanger! **

**Will it ever be resolved? (It will, don't panic) :D **

**Please review! And let me know if you have any ideas for what should happen next...**


	7. Morning After

**A/N: thank you all for the great response i've had to this story! Sorry this chapter is a bit short...**

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He knew he was completely wasted.

If the swaying and the inability to walk in a straight line wasn't enough to tell him, then the empty bottle of whiskey in his hand was. He couldn't remember starting it, but whatever. He'd sure as hell finished it.

The party was starting to wind down and he knew that most of the glee members had already left. Finn was still in the den with Matt and Mike and Santana would be around somewhere, probably fucking some random guy in his bed (he made a mental note to himself to change his sheets). Other than that, it was just an assortment of cheerio's and dudes off the football team.

He was heading to the kitchen – to get a glass of water? He wasn't really sure – but yeah, that sounded like a good idea. His mouth felt dry and tasted disgusting, like something had crawled in and died when he wasn't paying attention. To be honest he didn't have a fucking clue what was going on anymore. He'd stopped thinking straight half a bottle ago and the only thing he could see was the image of Rachel winding herself round Mike, stretching upwards so she could get as close to him as possible.

And fuck. It got to him a shit load more than it should. Because she wasn't his girlfriend; he wasn't even sure if she was his friend.

But they'd totally had a moment out there on the veranda. They'd been having moments for weeks really – at least, he'd been counting them as moments and the more he'd seen her, the more she'd driven him crazy. And when he'd finally come to the conclusion that he should got get her she'd been right there in front of him – only she'd had her lips all over Mike Chang instead on him.

Which was messed up, because the dude had only figured out how hot she was like two minutes ago (and granted, he was on pretty weak ground here seeing as he'd never actually done anything about it even though he'd known it for years) but the dick was getting her already. It was all wrong. If there was any kind of justice in the world it would have been him kissing her senseless. It would be his name she would be moaning and if he had it his way, she'd be waking up next to him the next morning too.

Without paying attention to where he was going and before he could really stop himself, his feet had carried him to the den and Mike was suddenly in front of him. And even though the alcohol had taken the edge off his anger, he was still fucking pissed. Mike was sitting next to Finn on the couch and grinning, which made him want to punch the guy straight out, but he settled for walking over and glaring down at him stead.

"Where's Rachel?" he growled.

Mike took a swig of his beer and then shrugged. "Went with Kurt I think."

"You mean you didn't even fucking bother to see if she got home ok?"

His fists clenched at the unconcerned look on Mike's face and he was starting to lose signal from the part of his brain that was telling him that beating up his best friend would be a bad idea.

"Dude, what's up?" Finn asked, starting to get to his feet. The look on Puck's face was setting alarm bells ringing in his head, because whenever he got that belligerent expression you knew shit was about to go down.

Puck took an aggressive step closer to Mike. "What's up is that this douche bag kisses girls then doesn't give a shit about what happens to them after."

"I do give a shit; I'm seeing her again tomorrow aren't I? And Jesus Puckerman, how much did you drink? You smell like a brewery" the Asian guy laughed.

Puck scowled, but there was part of him that now felt justified in beating the crap out of Mike. Because, fuck it. Rachel deserved better. And the jerk deserved what was coming to him.

"Not enough, asshole."

Mike's smile disappeared. "Look, I don't know what you're problem is –"

"You."

"I haven't done anything to you!"

"Guys, I think you should both calm down" Finn interjected, trying to place himself in front of Mike, who had stood up too.

"I want to know why the hell he's all in my face."

Puck took another step forward. "How fucking dumb to you have to be? She could have been drunk and you know she can't handle it. Kurt might have left without her – it looked like he was hooking up with Lawson anyway. So she could be lying in a flowerbed somewhere right now! You've basically just let Rachel –"

"What's any of this got to do with Rachel?" Mike demanded.

_Everything. _

"Nothing."

"So why do you suddenly give a damn about her now?"

That was when Puck broke. Because he hadn't _just_ started giving a damn about her. He'd cared about her for weeks – months even – and had just been too stupid to act on it. And here was Mike, all high and mighty, pointing out what a huge fucking mess he'd made of everything.

So he launched himself forward, not caring that Finn was standing in the way; not caring that he was still holding the empty bottle in his hand like a weapon.

It was only much, much later when he was lying in bed in the dark, his knuckles bruised from blow after blow that he'd reigned down on Mike's face before Finn and Matt had managed to pull him off, that it dawned on him that Rachel would definitely not approve of violence.

* * *

Rachel woke up with a horrible hangover and an ominous feeling in the pit of her stomach. But she decided to ignore both of these things for the immediate future, because her bed was warm and comfy and she didn't want to move even in the slightest because her head ached terribly and she was guessing it would only throb more the second she got up. And if she had done something she would later regret, she didn't want to deal with it until she was feeling less inclined to throw up. Sighing, she snuggled down under her duvet and tried to concentrate on anything other than the dull pain pounding in her temples.

She must have gone back to sleep, because when she opened her eyes again the light in her room had taken on a different quality. She could hear Mr Oldman mowing the lawn next door and the low rumble of cars from the freeway, but no sound from downstairs. A golden shaft of sunlight was streaming in through a gap in her curtains and she guessed that it must be around midday, in which case her dad's would have already left for work. Sitting up (her head didn't seem to protest too much against this, which was promising) she noticed that there was a note lying at the foot of her bed. Leaning forward, she picked it up and read –

_Rachel, _

_We didn't like to wake you seeing as you got in so late. Kurt brought you back at around 2am (such a sweet boy, he helped daddy get you up the stairs after you were sick in the hall) and I think he wanted you to call him when you woke up. Something about discussing the success of your make-over – I hope that makes sense to you, sweetie because we had no idea what he was talking about! We've left coffee and toast for you on the counter and should be back around six for dinner._

_Love Dad_

_X _

Her dad's words seemed to trigger memories in her brain and then suddenly, the events of last night were flooding back to her. The crashing disappointment and hurt as Puck had walked away from her, following Santana in to the house. The way she'd sat out there, alone in the dark, wondering why she'd been stupid enough to believe that wearing a short, low cut dress would make him like her – feeling humiliated for dressing up like that for a boy who evidently didn't see her as anything more than an amusement, a pastime. And hating herself for abandoning her principles that women should never allow themselves to be objectified by the opposite sex. Then she had gone into the kitchen and accepted the drink Brittany had offered her (or was it two drinks?) and after that all she could remember was wondering into the hall and bumping into Mike, who was smiling, and wrapping his arms around her and whispering in her ear that she was beautiful.

The next thing she knew she'd been kissing him, and not really knowing why, but having a vague notion that it was something to do with Noah and her stupid red dress and the fact that she didn't want to be alone.

"Oh God" she murmured, pushing the covers away and getting hurriedly to her feet.

Because now that she was sober and was viewing things in the cold light of day, it all seemed rather dramatic.

She wasn't the sort of person that went round kissing boys that were supposedly her friends to get back at _other_ boys who had never really expressed an interest in her. And she certainly didn't usually get drunk.

This was obviously just a chapter that she would have to put behind her (once she'd sorted things out with Mike of course, and explained to him that she didn't actually want anything to happen) and then store it away in the back of her mind. She could draw on the experience if she ever had to play the role of a loose woman.

And Noah, she would just have to forget entirely.

Even thinking about him caused her to feel a small stab of anger, mixed with embarrassment. Because really, it had been her own foolishness that had got her into this situation, and nothing more.

* * *

When she pulled up outside Mike's house she was surprised to find Finn and Matt coming out the front door.

"Hello" she greeted them, as she climbed out of her Volvo. "Isn't this rather early for you two to be up? I would have thought you would have been recovering after last night."

Finn grinned ruefully. "I did have a bit too much to drink."

"Not as much as Puck though" added Matt.

"True."

The two boys exchanged looks and Rachel's intuition was aroused.

"Did something happen?" she asked.

"Er, he sort of got into a fight" Finn admitted.

"Couldn't really call it a fight" Matt chipped in. "More of a one way punch-the-crap out-of-Mike."

"He attacked _Mike_?" she demanded. "Why on earth would he do that? What was he thinking?"

Ok, so her decision to put Noah completely out of her mind wasn't going all that well.

"Well he wasn't thinking" said Finn. "At least, not in any sober sense anyway."

"I figured that's why you were here" said Matt, looking at her curiously. "I thought you must have heard about it and come to see if he was ok. You know, after last night and everything…"

The implied meaning in her words made her blush.

"Well, no… actually I was – sort of coming to apologise for last night actually."

"Oh."

Thankfully, Matt was a man of few words.

"Well he's inside" said Finn. "If you hurry up he might offer you some of his breakfast. I got two pop tarts."

She laughed. "Thanks. See you guys later."

As Finn and Matt walked over to their cars she walked up to the front door and rang the bell. After a minute or so Mike opened it and she gasped in shock at his appearance. He had a black eye, which gave his face a strange lopsided look and his left cheekbone seemed to be completely covered in dark, purplish bruises. His lip also seemed to be quite puffed up and she thought she could detect a small fleck of dried blood on his hairline.

"Mike! Are you alright?" she cried, taking a step forward.

"Hey Rach" he said, trying to smile, although the action looked strangely grotesque considering his present state. "Come on in."

She followed him into the kitchen and as soon as she was seated, with Mike sitting across from her at the table, she started up again.

"I'm appalled that Noah did this to you! It's completely irresponsible and violent behaviour like this entirely backs up my theory that alcohol and teenagers never mix! What made him do it? I mean, I knew he was somewhat hot headed but I never thought he would turn on one of his friends, especially seeing as it was Finn's birthday party!"

Mike shrugged. "I'm not taking it personally."

Rachel gaped. "How can you be so calm about this?"

"He was an asshole. And yeah, it's not like I'm happy with him right now, but Finn and Matt managed to pull him off before he did too much damage."

"That's hardly the point! The fact that he even tried to inflict harm at all, implies that –"

"Rach, seriously. You don't need to get all outraged on my behalf like this, however cute it is." He smiled at her. "But Puck wouldn't go for me like that if he didn't have a reason. He's not a bad person, however warped his motives may have been. So I'm just trying to figure out what it is."

"Have you got anywhere?" she asked, not sure why her heart was suddenly pounding.

"Yeah. I have actually."

"And?"

Mike sighed. "It's all about you."

She wasn't sure she'd heard him correctly. "I'm sorry, did you say _me_?"

"Yes. It's obvious he likes you."

"I – think you must have got it wrong" she told him blankly. Why was Mike saying this? Had Noah said something to him? She should really stop thinking about him when she was sitting in front of somebody that he'd just beaten up. It was highly unethical.

"The reason he got mad at me was because I didn't see you home last night. I think he must have seen us kissing."

Noah was concerned about her safety? This was completely contradicting everything that she'd thought about him since she woke up and it was leaving her feeling extremely confused. But before she could ask him any more, she had to deal with the situation at hand.

"Mike, about that –"

"I know" said Mike, and his expression was resigned.

"You do?"

"When I was getting you into the passenger seat of Kurt's care – you really can't hold your drink you know – you told me that it had all been a mistake."

_Oh God. _She really didn't remember any of this.

"I did?" she asked hesitantly.

"Yeah. And I get it. I think that maybe we're better as friends anyway."

She sighed in relief. "Mike, I'm so glad you feel that way."

"So we're cool then?"

"Definitely" she smiled. Which at least sorted out one of the problems in her life.

Mike was standing up, and she followed his lead. "As one friend to another then, I think you should go and talk to Puck."

"I think you're mistaken" she told him quietly.

"Perhaps" he shrugged. "But you can't know until you ask, right?"

Right. And what was there to lose?

Other than her pride, her dignity and her heart.

* * *

**Ahh things are finally starting to get sorted out! Please review and let me know what you think! :) **


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